First Evaluation

Today we had our first project evaluation (of fragrances created from a chosen visual image). I chose a magazine ad of a beautiful woman walking along a rocky beach in a yellow bikini. My final product was subtler (more subtle?) than I intended, but overall I was happy. I used ginger, nutmeg, and bergamote, along with many synthetic materials, to convey the warmth of sunshine, the fruitiness of suntan oil, and the freshness of saltwater spray.

The most exciting part was using little bottles with vaporizers to SPRAY our perfumes onto each other. (How authentic, whoo!) We tested everything on everybody's skin, from my beachy scent to Isabelle's horsey-animalic scent...and it was amazing how different they smelled on each person. The end result, however, is that we now all stink. I'm probably wearing 300 different and UNBLENDED chemicals. Some of us are going out for dinner to celebrate, and I have a feeling we'll get some evil eyes!

In other news, it snowed yesterday in Versailles. The wind is frigid, but the inch of white frosting was quite lovely.

Also, I am really excited about the opportunity to complete an internship this summer in Hamburg, Germany. (Unfortunately, I don't speak German...) but I'll be working with a British perfumer on whatever projects he is doing at the time. I got a tourist guide to Hamburg and it looks like a pretty summer city. There's a huge port for international trade (the town is not costal but was built around 2 large rivers), and a rather large number of foreigners, so I think it's fairly modern and cosmopolitan. Most of the buildings are modern, too, with lots of red brick, after old architecture was destroyed by fires and bombs... Now if I can just find another apartment!

It's cold and windy, I smell like a dying tree on a sunny day, and I'm late for dinner. :)

A plus! (Til next time!)

New Year's Weekend

...spent in Durham with some of my closest friends from college. It was SO nice to be home for the holidays!!

Here we are after a great round of karaoke. Thanks to Joey for the photo.

Laptop Life

I spent 5 hours (FIVE HOURS!) on the telephone with a very nice DELL representative to install a new hard drive for my laptop. After 5 hours and a flashing screen that left the technician--and I quote--"dumbfounded," everything seems to be up and running. However, due to an intense desire to keep my life simple, I will not be taking the computer back to France. I'll continue to use the school computers like I did before.

In some ways it's harder to live in France than in Japan, and for the next 6 months I want my life to be as hassle-free as possible so that I may focus on...perfume.

Blast from the Past, Part 2

So in honor of being in France, I decided to post some funny stories from my study abroad experience in Paris 3 years ago. When I lived with a host family, I wrote down things that made me laugh, and I just re-discovered the file on my parents' computer. They still crack me up today...so I hope you enjoy.

* * *

-I love looking at the little dogs in this city:

Katie to me: Lauren, I thought you were staring at a hot guy, but when I turned to look, I realized you were checking out a poodle.

-on a tour of a tiny village near the chateau Chantilly:

me to Lauren Merkeley: Lauren, have you noticed that there’s a weird man following us on the tour?

Lauren Merkeley: No way, really?

Me: Yeah, he’s been with us ever since we got off the bus!

Lauren Merkeley: You mean the bus driver?

(I crack up at my own stupidity.)

Zain to me: What are you girls laughing at? What’s so funny?

Lauren Merkely: Oh not much, just introducing a little logic.

-at dinner with my host family and their friends, who are all at least 65 years old:

friend to host mom: My friend’s daughter was on her honeymoon, and when she got to the island she called her mother to say she’d forgotten her luggage. But instead of sending it, her mom replied, “Dear, it’s your honeymoon; do you really need your suitcase??”

-at “home”:

host mom to me: What day should we eat together?

Me: I don’t know.

(host dad suggests a night to eat)

host mom to me: Ah, he’s right. Good idea.

host dad to me, joking: Of course I’m right—I’m a man! Men are always right!

host mom to me: Don’t listen to him, the old fool! (and she whacks him in the stomach with her spatula)

-at someone else’s house for dinner:

older man to me: I went to the US once, and in general I liked it, but you know what really got on my nerves? The clothes! Everyone there wears the brightest colors!

-my host family in Lyon, to everyone they introduced me to: And this is the little American that’s staying with us for the weekend!

-in a restaurant, the first time I met Steve (hot guy from Cornell who speaks French very well)

me: So how long have you been taking French?

Steve: Well, only for about a year. But I’ve been French-kissing for quite some time now.

-making fun of EDUCO people:

-Katie: I love Bahij, he cracks me up. But he’s a very simple guy.

Merkley: Simple? I think Bahij is complicated. Self-tanner, hello, that’s not simple!

-in my animation class, where the prof. always likes to discuss the philosophy of theater and animation

prof: (talking about something obscure) Yes, it is invisible, but it’s invisible for a very good reason: it doesn’t exist.

-the whole French-speaking population, to me at least every other day (literally): Excuse me, can you tell me where the nearest metro station is? Or where this street is? Or if this direction will get me to the train station? Or what time it is? Or where exactly this metro is going?

-my host father works in advertising, so he likes to discuss the giant ads in the metro stations

host dad to his wife and me: Have you seen the latest lingerie ad? Where the woman is wearing a bra that’s the exact same color as her skin? FREAKY!

-on the difficulty of relating to French guys:

Emily to me: Yeah, I’ll meet someone who’s hot, but then he’ll just go and do something French, and I won’t be attracted to him anymore.

-French woman to a friend of mine who’s Mormon (doesn’t drink), and who happens to dislike cheese: You’re in the wrong country, my friend.

-and the one that prob. tops them all:

Last night I was having dinner with my host family at their friend's house. They poured me a glass of wine that was made from vineyards at their "country house." Then the host-man started telling a story.

host: A few years ago someone thought our wine had a potato flavor.

host's wife: No, let me tell it. You do a horrible job of telling stories. So, a few years ago someone thought our wine had a potato flavor. And we said, "really?" Well how interesting. I"ve heard of fruit notes, wood notes, even burnt toast notes, but no potato notes. So we decided to examine the barrel of wine that this bottle had come from...and floating inside the wine was a drowned mouse! Haha! So mice must taste like potatoes!

host to me: So, what do you think of the wine?

HAHAHAHAHA :)

Winter Break Update

Now that I'm in North Carolina for a lovely 3-week vacation, I have some time AND an internet connection. I hope everyone had a great Christmas - mine was fantastic, even more enjoyable since I was in Japan last year! It feels really good to be home.

The first 'semester' of school ended quickly. Things in France were hectic and we had a big exam on the last day, which was interrupted by an emergency trip to the Prefecture for a temporary visa (so that I can return to France in January. The timing was awful but at least I GOT it!).

For the exam we were given about 15 raw materials that we had to identify and describe "from scratch," with no background or context clues. We had to list what types of perfumes they are appropriate for and why, their different rates of evaporation (volatility), and other properties related to perfumery. Basically, we had to know everything we've studied the past two months. Then we had to identify a few perfumes and discuss why they were 'landmarks.' It was very similar to an art history test, where you view slides, date and describe the work of art, then discuss the relevant art movement and its significance. (I knew perfumery was artistic, but I never realized the extent to which perfumers really are artists, until now!) I nailed all the perfumes, in part thanks to my grandmother. When I was younger Manana used to give me little bottles of L'Air du Temps. I'm sure you've seen the round bottles of yellow liquid with two flying doves on the top? This floral fragrance was launched after World War II and has a strong carnation note. I recognize it instantly because the second it hits my nose, an image of Manana pops into my head. I guess that was the confidence booster I needed because the rest came to me easily.

* * *

I've been called uptight before, but I thought there was one rule when it comes to cheating: you don't do it. For me it's not so much about being 'uptight' as being PROUD. I'm too proud to cheat. In some people's eyes, this just makes me conservative or 'prudish.' Here's a conversation I had with someone in my class:

John Doe: Well, we're getting a grade, but this exam is mostly an assesment for our own information. So we don't have to worry about cheating.

Me: What? Do you mean that if this test were more important, then you'd want to cheat?

John Doe: (no response)

...then, during the test...

John Doe: Do you think the answer is X?

Me: Don't ask me.

John Doe: Do you think the answer is X?

Me: Don't ask me.

What's WITH people? I don't care if I'm earning a GPA or not. I don't cheat. I don't see how anybody does so in good conscience. In any case, I'd always trust my own nose before somebody else's. Perfumery is in large part instinct, and I don't like to second-guess my guts. Why would somebody else?

* * *

Here's wishing everyone continued holiday spirit and a very happy New Year. Got any resolutions?

Class Photos

...compliments of Christian! The sophisticated lady without a labcoat is our instructor.

Tidbits

The cheapest raw material in the world is benzyl acetate, at about 3.50 euros per kilo. It's in quite a few floral notes, including jasmine, and smells like fake bananas. I recognize it as the product most likely to give me an instant headache. (Anything that ends in -ate can cause no small amout of pain if you inhale with too much enthusiasm).

The most expensive material is iris root absolute, at about 100,000.00 euros per kilo. Getting this fragrance takes up to six years while you wait for the roots to mature underground. It smells kind of floral, kind of plant-like, green, and mild, not what you'd imagine the 'Kohinor' of perfume materials to smell like!

Today we had a guest speaker who used to work for Chanel. He showed us some extremely old perfumes that are no longer on the market, such as one created 2,000 years ago called "Perfume Royale." Main ingredients? Honey, cinnamon, and cloves. Yum.

The Lab

Here are our mixing tables and a sample of the raw materials in the fridge. Most of the chemicals are liquids, but the powders, crystals and gums must be microwaved to make dilutions. Alcohol boils very easily, so we're talking 10 seconds max! The room with the fridges is SO smelly. It's not unpleasant but it's a real fruit-salad-soup, despite the fact that some materials are nestled Russian-doll-style inside three different containers.

Busy!

Thanks to all the faithful readers out there. :) My intention was to update my blog more frequently, but that is complicated by a number of factors - progress on my computer is slow to nonexistent, and I just plain don't have much time to hang around the school computer lab. But there are healthy consequences to this as well. The time I spend in front of a computer screen each day has decreased about 500%. And the time I spend with my nose in a bottle has increased about 900%. (Don't worry, I checked our chemicals against the FDA's toxicology list and all my brain cells should be intact). Perfumery is quite challenging and I'm tired at the end of every day. But the key is that I always want to wake up and come to school. Today we tried to construct a Thierry Mugler ANGEL-like accord. All the vanilla and chocolatey notes in this perfume made me hungry. But the chocolate effect comes from patchouli, not cocoa.

Versailles has been a great transition for me after Fuji...it's slightly bigger and my location is more central, with a beautiful lake 5 minutes away. The open-air markets are the icing on the cake. So while I still miss Japanese food and my daily dose of Mt. Fuji (not to mention my FRIENDS there!), as a small city Versailles feels like a step in the right direction.

Want to ask me questions? Feel free to post them in the comments!

A few photos of the lab (and maybe one of my roommate) are coming soon...

Perfume School 101

If you weren't lucky enough to receive a huge email from me (I say lucky with sarcasm, since it was too long for anyone to actually read), here's a more recent update...

First, I apologize for the lack of photos, but laptop problems persist and the school computers have no USB ports. Rest assured that when I have good pictures and am able to post them, I will.

Second, I love school. I spend about 7 hours a day in a small lab (with 7 other people from around the world) as we familiarize ourselves with raw materials (natural and synthetic), and learn about perfume families. This is more confusing than you might think. As scents become more modernized (read: more synthetic), the whole library of smells is growing, even while many synthetic products are replacing natural ones. More sources = more variation = more categories to organize. But to smell a chemical that is found nowhere in nature, that simultaneously evokes caramelized sugar, chocolate, cranberries, and raspberries...it is quite a heady experience.

Lately we've been working on creating floral accords from synthetics. Our teacher (a wonderful, kind, sophisticated, beautiful woman with wild coats) doles out numerous synthetic raw materials. We smell and describe each one, pencils flying as we try to make note of everything to study later. Then the teacher says, "Ok, now compose a rose." And we spend the rest of the afternoon diluting and mixing and re-mixing to find the right proportions of each material that will together produce a satisfying rose. Mine was a bit fruity, with a sweet note that lingered for days (a potential plus), and overall I was happy with it. What fascinates me is that anyone could identify it as a rose, though there was nothing natural about it.

(As a side note, "synthetic" does not mean it is never found in nature. Many synthetics are single molecules that occur naturally but are copied and built in a laboratory. For example, a molecule found in cloves can be isolated and then produced by people in a lab, without the rest of the cloves notes.)

The past few days were more challenging because we studied lilly of the valley. I don't have an image of lilly of the valley in my mind, which makes it difficult for me to whip one up out of synthetics. The other thing is that as new chemicals are created in labs, the market idea of what lilly of the valley smells like changes over time. So you can create different styles of this flower -- some greener (like cut grass) and fruitier; some softer and more floral, like baby powder or fabric softeners. Also, there is no natural version of lilly of the valley perfume. Despite all the available methods, it's impossible to obtain this flower's natural scent, so everything has to be synthesized.

Tomorrow we'll begin jasmine, which is my favorite floral note. It's a very complex, multi-faceted scent, but I already have an imagine in my mind of what the final product should smell like. I'm looking forward to breaking it down and learning about how each component works together. Jasmine is a white flower but it always makes me think of something three dimensional, sensual, and dark purple. And something that rotates on an axis. I have no idea why those images come to my mind, but anything that helps you remember a smell is a good thing. :)

Happy breathing...especially with the onset of fall!

Downtown Versailles

the flower market

My School

The Fragrance Academy

The Apartment

Thanks to Mom I now have some great photos...but for the moment this is all the school computer can handle. There's one of me being silly in my apartment, one of The Fragrance Academy, and one of the flower market in downtown Versailles.

La Cuisine

I guess it's no surprise that moving from Japan to France can give quite a culture shock!

You know the state of mind just minutes before falling asleep, where you think you are dreaming and don't realize that you are actually awake? A few nights ago in that stage of pre-sleep, I realized that I was "dreaming" about Japanese food: cold soba, instant sticky rice and salmon and seaweed, big hot oily restaurant portions of miso ramen with bamboo shoots and hard-boiled eggs, chewy rice cakes and sweet red bean paste...I am still going through Japanese food withdrawal. I want it every day.

Which is ironic, since I am in The Land of Good Food. Maybe I should qualify that with "In the West." My cheese and red wine intake have both increased by about 200%. I am certainly not complaining. I've had fun preparing various dishes I couldn't make in Japan: whole wheat garlic pasta, grilled cheese with brie, goat cheese and fresh strawberries, portobello mushrooms with (what else) big slabs of camembert. And did I mention the coffee ice cream? (Noel heaven, Bill!) Yum.

Antonio, on the other hand, prefers Spanish sausage with his bread, instead of cheese. Last night he made me eat a piece insisting it was the "secret of Spain." (Whatever that can mean for a tubular hunk of pig.) The sausage was bloody and looked raw, but considering my diet last year, I can't use "raw" as an excuse to say no. I ate it, and it tasted good. Kind of spicy.

I never guessed that moving to France would teach me more about Spain...but it just goes to remind me that no matter how much globe-trotting I do, I will always know less than there actually is to know out there. It may be a small world, but it's cram-packed full of stuff.

Alive!

Hi everyone, sorry for the lack of recent posts but I've had some trouble with communication. There is no phone line for the internet in my apartment, but in any case, my computer crashed recently. (Great timing; I guess all the traveling wore it out!) For now I'm relying on internet cafes and the computer lab at ISIPCA.

Getting established again has been quite a whirlwind, to say the least! This time there's no school full of teachers and office ladies willing to help me with the details, but at least I can speak the language. It feels really good to be surrounded by French again. Not to mention gardens and goat cheese and colorful open-air markets!

So far I like Versailles much more than I expected (I envisioned a small town full of people jaded by Chateau tourists). But people have been nicer than I remembered. And with its history and established neighborhoods, Versailles feels like a mini-Paris. Luckily I live near the Chateau gardens and a small lake that was donated by Switzerland about 400 years ago. I'm happy to be so close to nature in the middle of a town.

My courses have not yet begun but I've visited the school a few times. It's in the middle of a very charming residential neighborhood, and the old brick ivy-covered buildings look like they were former mansions. The halls smell like roses and violets, and everyone wears lots of black under crisp white labcoats. I can't wait for classes to start.

My living situation has changed a few times but for now this is the deal: the landlord rented the other room to a young Spanish man who is working in France for his Masters (something related to plastics and engineering). Initially I wasn't too thrilled about living with a guy I don't know, but since I'm renting I don't have much say in the matter. Antonio just moved in today, so I don't know him yet, but he seems very nice. And clean. And respectful. And he bought a TV. So far so good!

In the meantime, I've been to Paris a few times, and gone out with a French guy I met randomly while Mom was here. I think next week I'll go to school and try to be productive; I want to help teach the beginning French class for the other international students. It would be a good review for me too.

Mom had a lot of trouble with her luggage (that's an understatement!) but she was a huge help getting me settled and a lot of fun to explore Versailles with! I plan to return to the gardens for another bike-ride soon.

One of my favorite teachers in Japan, a kind man I often played tennis with, recently had surgery for lung cancer. So far he is doing well. I miss all my friends!

France is really wrapped in red tape so it takes a while to get settled. But I am REALLY excited to be here, I feel really good about my situation and my school, and I can't wait to get into perfume. Mom took a lot of photos, so maybe when she emails them to me I can post them on the blog. More updates to come and I hope you all are doing well.

Last Night in Japan

Meegan took these photos on my last night in Japan. We had dinner at a crepe shop (of all places, but it was one of our favorite spots--yay France!!) and then did a couple hours of karaoke (yay Japan!!) I was so into the music that I didn't know she took karaoke shots...but some of them turned out pretty well. Look how serious I am, hah! Chocolate crepes and karaoke are no laughing matters.

I would also like to point out that it was the first time the entire year that I left my apartment in a tank-top (straps are a huge no-no in Japan). But it was my last night, and I was ready to let loose and enjoy Fuji while preparing to re-enter the West. What a rebel.

Packing

I can't believe that the day after tomorrow, I'm moving to France.

Tonight I am exhausted from a day of hauling and folding and rolling. You'd think international packing would be old hat by now (hah!)...and to a certain extent it is. I've gotten lazier and sloppier because I can remember what I unpacked from Japan a month ago. But it seems that my belongings have expanded.

When I moved to Japan I had 2 suitcases, but a few months later my parents sent me a box of winter clothes. This time I am packing all my winter clothes, plus toiletries that are no longer allowed onto the plane...so this time I just have more stuff. Mom is coming to France as well (yay!!) and she generously offered to take a suitcase of my things with her. In total, I've got my 2 bags plus 1 that Mom is taking. At least we're not paying postage.

The funny thing is, when you look at everything, it's not even that much. It's basically everything I need to last me the entire year, including one 3-pound jar of crunchy peanut butter--which I insisted on packing because it's a delightful, filling, protein-packed spread the French do not import in large enough quantities to find in Paris without great huffing and puffing and wasted metro money. (Ever seen a French peanut butter cup? There's a reason why not. So into the suitcase goes the JIF.)

The initial arrangement was to share my apartment with a young French student. It's very unusual for French students to move out of their parents' houses, and evidently this case was no exception: she changed her mind and decided not to move in to "our" apartment. So currently I have no flat-mate, but this could change as soon as Friday.

As I talk with others or think to myself, I mentally translate my words into French. A few times I've had to crack the dictionary, to look up such random words as: bald, pillow, to dress / get dressed, empty. In Japan, there were often French movies on John's satellite TV. With only Japanese subtitles to assist, I got to practice my listening skills, and for the most part I could understand. I don't want to jinx myself, but I think French will come back to me pretty quickly. I also think that, compared to learning Japanese, it might even seem easy. Au naturel. :)

In the past couple days I've been self-absorbed trying to get everything ready. But don't think that you haven't crossed my mind. I am sad, yes, to leave the time zone again...there are many people to miss. But maybe I'll have lots of visitors this year!

I plan to have the internet at my apartment, but I'm not sure how long that will take to set up. This may be the last post from me until I get things situated...but just know that I am thinking about you all! Much love to everyone and I hope the upcoming "year" is good for us all.

I am so excited, and I can't believe this is really happening.

And I want to say congratulations to a couple of my best friends in the entire world:

Mayumi will become Atsushi-san on March 24, 2007

and then

Hilary will become Mrs. Lee on September 22, 2007.

I can't believe my friends are becoming "Mrs."s!!

One down...and tomorrow and I'm outta' here!
--Ben Folds

Other Kinds of Prayer

The only sure path is to live consciously, moment to moment, as you let go of the outcome.

Obsessive thinking signals that we are not telling the truth, either to ourselves or another person.

--Charlotte Kasl

Don't grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.

Lo, I am with you always means when you look for God, God is in the look of your eyes, in the thought of looking, nearer to you than your self, or the things that have happened to you. There's no need to go outside. Be melting snow. Wash yourself of yourself. A white flower grows in the quietness. Let your tongue become that flower.

I have lived on the lip of insanity, wanting to know reasons, knocking on a door. It opens. I've been knocking from inside!

--Rumi

Between living and dreaming, there is a third thing.

Guess it.

--Antonio Machado

Certain Kind of Prayer

I don't travel to run away. I don't travel to forget. I travel to learn. But I like the way Paul Theroux said it:

"You have to find out for yourself. Take the leap."

"Nothing induces concentration or stimulates memory like an alien landscape or a foreign culture. It is simply not possible (as romantics think) to lose yourself in an exotic place. More likely, you will experience intense nostalgia, a harking back to an earlier stage of your life."

Every time you give something up and move on to something else, you remember how full your life is, how lucky you are. If you're open to starting over, instead of leaving things behind, you end up staring everything straight in the face.

When I began to feel settled in Japan, I wrote a post about contentment. I was really happy and started to wonder, "So, is this it? Is this all it takes? Can I stop here? Is this good enough? What happens tomorrow when I am content today?" I started to feel this itch, like "home" was closing in on me much sooner than I expected. I was ready to feel settled much earlier than I had predicted. That was scary. But when I was really quiet with that idea, when I really let it sink in, I realized...nope! I'm not quite there yet! I have to keep going! So I leave for France knowing it is the best path for me to be on. What's a year, right? Look how quickly Japan flew by, and look how much I learned. I still want that. But unlike Japan, I approach France with something different in my chest. It's not in my heart or my stomach, but somewhere deeper. It's like somebody snuck inside of me and turned on a night-light: I want to settle down sooner than I thought. It's there and glowing--not blazing yet because now just isn't the right time--but it's going to spark into a flame pretty soon. I can feel it.

And I am so, so excited.

Today I'm getting lost in Paris and perfume. Tomorrow I'll be singing this:

If there’s a plane or a bus leaving Dallas
I hope you’re on it
If there’s a train moving fast down the tracks
I hope you caught it
'Cause I swear out there
ain’t where you ought to be
So catch a ride, catch a cab
Don’t you know I miss you bad
But don’t you walk to me
Baby run, cut a path across the blue skies
Straight in a straight line
You can’t get here fast enough
Find a truck and fire it up
Lean on the gas and off the clutch
Leave Dallas in the dust
I need you in a rush
So baby, run

--George Strait
...

One thing at a time. :)

Non-Attachment

If I hold you with my emotions,
you'll become a wished-for companion.

If I hold you with my eyes,
you'll grow old and die.

So I hold you where
we both mix
with the infinite.

--Rumi