16 November 2005

Fuji-San

Japan is still “new” for me after a mere four months, whereas others have lived in and defined this land for thousands of years. So it would seem brash to claim that I understand some parts of Japan beyond translation. But I don’t think I oversimplify when I say that I know how to love Mt. Fuji.

When I photocopy lesson plans, when I wave good-bye to the cross-country team, when I struggle to recall the name of a sea urchin’s ovary but confuse it with the word for raw salmon eggs, when my students’ eyes light up because their American teacher is laughing, when I’m thinking about something so hard all I see is my right foot, my left foot, and my right foot again on the sidewalk…in any of these given moments, I might happen to look up. And there is Mt. Fuji.

Just there, like she was the day before. So stereotypically huge and majestic, yet so freshly modest and unimposing – unaware that she exists, much less that she is beautiful. (I say “she” because Mayumi insists Mt. Fuji is a woman. And without asking for an explanation, I agree with her). Every day Fuji changes, but every day she is there. When I notice this, I realize that I have a lot in common with her.

Maybe the humid Fuji sky reflects so much light that she is invisible – the clouds have become an illusion that look not like the shroud of an ancient volcano, but like an open, empty gap in the landscape. Maybe you can barely discern the vague trace of her shape, and you are left to wonder about the living texture of her body. Maybe the snow, shocking in its purity, has crept to the tree-line that is finally visible after the haze of summer. Maybe at dusk she is blushing, embarrassed by the naked wink of the sun.

Every day I learn something new about her. But as time reveals her changes, I always learn that she remains. Perhaps the spirit of Mt. Fuji is not really a woman. But I think within every woman there is the spirit of Mt. Fuji. Unlike the Japanese word for salmon egg, it is an understanding that needs not be taught.

1 comment:

Jessica Letizia said...

That was beautiful. Thank you for sharing it.